Paris-Dakar Rally Special (Famicom, 1988, ISCO/CBS Sony Group)

Let's be honest people. Dakar Rally race car drivers don't get paid nearly enough.

I mean, the aprox. 30 000 Dollars for first place just doesn't cut it. I mean if it was only an endurance race through hundreds of miles of difficult terrain with a huge chunk taking place in the desert then that would probably make sense.

The rather pointless and clunky RPG segment. All of it.

However, that isn't even the begining of the hardships participants must face every year. Why, beyond the necessity of not only finding a sponsor all on their own, taking care of all the preparations and chasing down random bank employees with their PIN details, they have to acquire the services of a top level navigator. And how else would they employ such a person then have then randomly assigned to them as a result of a button pressing minigame of course !

Remember, chose only the best care
of the one type availible !

And then there's the usual hardships, like having to make sure other drivers don't intentionaly drive into them from behind and somehow dammage their care while being unscathed, and then having to find a way through a maze and use their gas tank to create oil slips to bounce off oncoming opponents into nearby walls, prefferabely until their car explodes and leaves behind some extra fuel ! Otherwise fuel can only be obtained by using a trampoline to catch it as it's levitating in mid-air in the garage.

Who needs pit stops when you can get
all the spare parts you'll ever need by simply
screwing a trampoline to the hood of your car.
GENIUS

Let's not forget the exorbitant costs of modifying their standard issue race car to include an unlimited supply of missiles so they can shoot down all the giant mice blocking their path, or all the cost that goes into making the car completely air tight and manouverable under water so the drivers can waste some time shooting sharks while they dodge missiles and torpedoes dropped on them from above.

You have to also admire the remarkable physical state these drivers have to keep themselves in. Not only to be able to jump gaps to activate switches to turn off flamehtrowers, but also to be able to walk on clouds so they'll have enough room to build up some running speed ! I mean obviously the organisers could structure the competition so that unworthy people incapable of levitation could press these switches as well, but it's precisely this sort of thing that only allows the top in their field to participate !

Actual racing in this cross continential rally ?
Well don't get too used to it cause you'll
only see it again in the last level.
Where there's still nothing resembling actualy
racing anyone to the finish line.

And not only do these brave men have to use their trusted missiles to shoot giant ants and army tanks once they do manage to get to the desert, but also to be able to manouver across an intricate series of rafts with only a split second time to get from one to the other to avoid smashing into bits on the rocks.

Still it's good that in order to come in first place they don't actualy have to be first to cross the finish line or else this race would get simply absurd.




Okay, based on the above I think it is probably clear that Paris-Dakar Rally Special is so close to a realistic depiction of a real life race that it literaly blurs the line between reality and fiction.

The best part of this game.....

Mostly due to the question of how this could have been designed, programed, released and sold without the entiere staff suddenly sobering up and moving to South America under an assumed names.

....is the realism.

Then again ISCO doesn't seem to have developed anything after this so....